so, here’s the undecorated truth:
i have a migraine, i’ve had a hard day, i’ve had several pieces of difficult news over the last few days (nothing major or tragic, thank god, but just hard and upsetting), i feel fat and icky and sad and loser-ish and i just need people to say nice things to me.
was that straightforward and desperate/unabashed/unapologetic/honest enough?
thanks in advance- j
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Jan 21, 2012 @ 21:21:33
You’re terrific Julie, even with a migraine. Think how good it will feel when it’s gone!
Jan 21, 2012 @ 21:23:58
Nice things!!! LOL…..did you laugh? Hoping it will help your migraine!!
Jan 21, 2012 @ 21:32:43
Hey, fellow Seattlite! We might not all have a migraine right now (may it go away soon), but cabin fever has left most of us feeling fat and loser-ish! You, my dear, are not alone AND you are wonderful! The sun will come out soon and wash away these January blahs, I promise!
Jan 21, 2012 @ 21:34:01
could it be the weather in Washington? I’ve read that it is cloudy a lot and that would really be hard this time of the year. Here in Michigan it is cold but there is snow on the ground and the sun is shining which always makes me feel good. I know you are a strong person and will have a better attitude when the migraine goes away.
Jan 21, 2012 @ 21:36:31
SING IT LOUD! (despite the migraine)
I am woman, hear me roar
In numbers too big to ignore
And I know too much to go back an’ pretend
’cause I’ve heard it all before
And I’ve been down there on the floor
No one’s ever gonna keep me down again
CHORUS
Oh yes I am wise
But it’s wisdom born of pain
Yes, I’ve paid the price
But look how much I gained
If I have to, I can do anything
I am strong (strong)
I am invincible (invincible)
I am woman
You can bend but never break me
’cause it only serves to make me
More determined to achieve my final goal
And I come back even stronger
Not a novice any longer
’cause you’ve deepened the conviction in my soul
CHORUS
I am woman watch me grow
See me standing toe to toe
As I spread my lovin’ arms across the land
But I’m still an embryo
With a long long way to go
Until I make my brother understand
Oh yes I am wise
But it’s wisdom born of pain
Yes, I’ve paid the price
But look how much I gained
If I have to I can face anything
I am strong (strong)
I am invincible (invincible)
I am woman
Oh, I am woman
I am invincible
I am strong
FADE
I am woman
I am invincible
I am strong
I am woman
😉
Jan 21, 2012 @ 21:40:30
Julie, precious — it’s the damn migraine that’s got you blue! I’m grateful to know nothing about them — I think those who don’t get them have no idea. As to the rest of life’s current problems — you’re the champ handling that stuff. I think you’ve encouraged uncounted “pupils” to accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative! (My mom sang that a lot!) I figure we have a choice. I have a mental picture of optimism above the line, pessimism below — 50% each. Prayer helps too — bigtime. Those of us who love you and are so glad to know you, even virtually, will keep you in our thoughts — KNOWING this funk will pass! No doubt about it, luv.
Jan 21, 2012 @ 21:59:16
Girl, I feel your pain! This too shall pass, which DOES seem like a platitude, but is the truth. Sounds like time for a hot toddy! Whiskey (just a little), lemon, water and honey / spices – warmed… ;-/
Jan 21, 2012 @ 22:03:39
nice things {{{{{huggs}}}}}
Jan 21, 2012 @ 22:06:29
I feel downhearted and icky tonight as well and can understand that space you’re in. My 93 year old mother lives with us and tonight, after watching Lawrence Welk with her to give her joy (as always), she was ready for bed and I sent her there with my blessings, (as always), and realized I could FINALLY have the remote to myself and could watch whatever the H#$% I wanted..ANY channels that involved murder, mayhem, or any subject I could watch without cringing because my mother was sitting in the room….yippee! I soon heard the sounds of her coming back out of her room and, as I investigated the footsteps out of her room, and she said, as so many times before, “Oh, I didn’t realize how early it is! (winter darkness early)… she comes, grabs the remote and it’s at the mercy of what she wants to watch.
Out of her sight I do my punching in the air and silent curses and then let her be. I always remember, reluctantly at times, that she did a pretty stellar job of taking care of me, not only growing up, but in my “adult” life as well, so I can forgive her anything….BUT, this is hard.
Jan 21, 2012 @ 22:06:52
Awww Julie, I’m so sorry you are feeling this way. Of course, being snowed in for what, a week now, I’m sure isn’t helping anything. I’ve said this a lot in the past couple of days, just remember that: “this too shall pass.” 🙂 You know of course deep down you are none of those things. Hopefully, you will get a good nights sleep and feel better in the morning. I sincerely hope the migraine leaves you very soon. I hope you get to see sunshine and warmer weather very soon also. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. {{{{{HUGS}}}}
Jan 21, 2012 @ 23:31:51
You are an awesome mom to your kids and your chickens, a *w, and a strong person to admit when you need help!
Jan 21, 2012 @ 23:33:12
you are not alone ! many women around who go through life with ups and downs like you… isn’t nice to be connected ? you gonna be all right dear one.
Jan 22, 2012 @ 01:23:19
Your amazing, a great mom, friend, inspireing, and you have chickens! Hope you have a better day tomorrow! 🙂
Jan 22, 2012 @ 02:04:11
You have been an amazing source of inspiration and humor…. From this perspective you give give give, raise children, had your home life turned upside down, maintained grace while under duress in a very public way, moved….. With good reason you deserve some rest and reassurance. Thank you for your grace, your sharing, and your humanness. You are a wonderful woman!
Jan 22, 2012 @ 02:14:35
Julie, I too suffer from migraines, and I too am named Julie, which means nothing except for a kind of vague kinship on those levels. Those crappy days do pass, but they suck when you’re in them. But you’re not alone (unless you want to be). Thanks for your strength and inspiration through all of this Real Life S–t.
Love you!
Julie
Jan 22, 2012 @ 03:26:44
May the migraine lift never to return.
A friend of mine got rid of hers through reiki and reflexology.
Jan 22, 2012 @ 03:53:23
Julie, I’ve never met you, but you have opened my eyes to others outside my little bubble. You have touched many lives and provoked conversations and made people think for themselves. That’s no small task for one woman. Thank you for touching MY life. Be blessed today and always.
Jan 22, 2012 @ 04:10:46
I know it’s hard when you are suffering to really pull yourself up out of the muck, but you are a great soul, vibrant and alive. I’m grateful to know you and wish I could make things better. You are outspoken, funny, extremely clever, intelligent, and inspiring. I enjoy your easy going personality and your willingness to ebrance the obviously incorrectness of reality. And you are beautful. Simply beautiful.
Jan 22, 2012 @ 05:45:55
Thank God that you did make it through the week. Today is a new day and the beginning of a new week. Try hard not to bring too much of last week into this one.
I appreciate reading your frank and honest opinions about a variety of subjects, most of which I agree.
My wording for an old saying is, “Don’t judge someone until you have walked a mile in his shoes.” When you wrote about your illness some years ago, I felt that I now know why you are the special person that you are today.
Thanks for making me think more about simple things in life that are very important.
Gerald
Jan 22, 2012 @ 08:00:43
Migraines are the devil. End of story. I am so sorry you’ve gotten undesirable news, especially with the annual visit and all. As for telling you nice things…does it help at all to know that you have a friend all the way across the country that you’ve never met? When I’m stressed out, or need a laugh, or a minute away from my crazy busy life…I read your blog and its like reading a letter from a friend. I know I’m not your only blog follower who feels that way. So….get well, and enjoy the fact that your words are like balm on the hectic days of many of our lives.
Jan 22, 2012 @ 13:14:37
Awwww…..I’m sorry you’re having such a bad day (or week). I’m sure the nasty weather isn’t helping at all. Have a big (((((HUG))))), a cup of tea and maybe a nice cold washcloth over your eyes for a little headache relief.
Apparently not the day to ask for bread making help. 😉
Jan 22, 2012 @ 14:02:07
thank you- ask away- i could use a good distraction!
Jan 22, 2012 @ 14:05:07
thank you- one of the news things had to do with my writing. basically someone who thought i needed to be taken down a peg or two (or a thousand) and took it upon himself to sort of put me in my place lest i become arrogant… sigh… and you’re right that the migraine doesn’t help at all… but thanks so much for the kind words- they really do mean a lot!
Jan 22, 2012 @ 14:06:18
thank you for sharing that- i am so happy that i could give you that perspective, and knowing that i make a difference helps me want to continue to write 🙂
Jan 22, 2012 @ 14:07:42
awwwwwwwwww- have i told you lately that i love you? and that i love your daughter? oh, by the way, my family voted this weekend that we should get to keep your new baby for one week evey month- that’s ok with you, right? 😉
Jan 22, 2012 @ 14:08:15
thank you- i hope i will! and i love your comment, so sincere thanks to you!
Jan 22, 2012 @ 14:08:45
oh gosh, thanks- i’m currently looking into medical marijuana…
Jan 22, 2012 @ 14:11:43
thank you, my distant soul sister- i DON’T want to be alone… and it’s good to be reminded that these days really do pass… thanks!
Jan 22, 2012 @ 14:59:14
Well, somehow I neglected to read yesterday’s email until today, so I hope today is going much better than yesterday. And April’s right… she’s not your only blog follower who feels like you’re a friend I just haven’t met yet. 🙂
Jan 22, 2012 @ 17:14:05
oh thanks- you have no idea how much your kind words mean to me right now… 🙂
Jan 22, 2012 @ 17:14:43
thanks, ryan- today is shaping up to be more of the same, but reading these comments is definitely keeping me afloat 🙂
Jan 22, 2012 @ 17:14:55
thanks for that 🙂
Jan 22, 2012 @ 17:15:26
thanks- i needs lots of help lots of the time- look at how strong i am 😉
Jan 22, 2012 @ 17:16:05
thank you- it’s day 5 of the migraine, but i am all about the power of prayer, so please keep on. thanks!
Jan 22, 2012 @ 17:17:02
oh man- hide the remote!!!!!! and get a secret TV in your room!!! you are so much more patient than i think i could be… but thanks for the good perspective…
Jan 22, 2012 @ 17:17:15
thanks 🙂
Jan 22, 2012 @ 17:17:33
oh i wish that would do the trick!! 🙂
Jan 22, 2012 @ 17:18:12
thank you thank you- the trick is to not sink while i’m waiting for it to pass… but you are right that it will… thanks for being out there…
Jan 22, 2012 @ 17:18:37
i LOVE that you put this here!!!! thank you! 🙂
Jan 22, 2012 @ 17:19:48
i think it’s just the multi-day migraine and hormones and a combination of too many negative people and too many down people and too many things falling apart at the same time… but thanks for your confidence in me!
Jan 22, 2012 @ 17:20:49
thanks! sooner rather than later, i hope… 🙂
Jan 22, 2012 @ 17:21:00
yes! and thank you !
Jan 22, 2012 @ 17:21:39
thank you- i can’t even imagine it right now, but i know in theory that one day i’ll get there…
Jan 22, 2012 @ 19:28:53
Think of Simchas. At least it will distract for a moment.
Jan 22, 2012 @ 20:52:53
really????!!! you arrogant?? Tell that nasty, SMALL man to first get a dictionary (i have been following you since the beginning in Oak Parkand never picked up a hint of arrogance in any of your posts) and 2nd – GIVE HIM MY NUMBER…if he wants to be mean with someone – let him pick on someone who can dish it back (i’m migraine free and feelin’ frisky!)
Hopin’ you feel better soon. Hopefully some sun tomorrow in your neck of the woods. Sit in a sunny window – some of the oldtimers in my area are convinced that cabin fever is from a lack of sunshine – being stuck inside for days at a time.
Jan 22, 2012 @ 21:35:58
thank you thank you thank you thank you- i love when someone is willing to be a warrior on my behalf!!! right now i am getting out of the kitchen lest i eat even more of the chocolate chip/peanut butter chip cookies i just made. nothing like melty warm goodness to make you feel nurtured… it’s pouring rain outside, and i’m just grateful that one of my terrific kids is willing to brave the elements to give the cluck squad their supper… thanks again for the cheering up!
Jan 22, 2012 @ 21:37:04
okay dokey- i’ll try that!
Jan 23, 2012 @ 04:04:24
I think it’s a beautiful, gorgeous, raw response and you’re a beautiful, gorgeous raw woman right now. Migraines are a bitch, and you’re doing fantastic.
Things you are doing in the near future:
Inspiring us
Being Honest
being gorgeous and wonderful
Writing things we want to read
living
resting
loving
waiting
That’s a damn good list of things you’re doing right now, and that’s all we ask for! Go you! You rock, and we love you endlessly!
Jan 23, 2012 @ 11:28:57
uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh- deep breath- thanks for that- i really neede it…
Jan 23, 2012 @ 14:10:51
Ditto what Erin from Upstate New York Said… you?!?!!?!? Arogrant?
HARDLY! What I see is a woman (you) being honest, direct and quite logical…and sadly, SOME men are really threatened by this. (A******s!)
What I see is NOT *you* being arrogant, but HIM as being arrogant and needed to be taken down a notch or two.
KEEP ON BEING! LIVING! DOING WHAT YOU DO! And good luck with the migraine- it, too, shall pass- you have survived the others!
Jan 23, 2012 @ 18:48:54
huh- deep breath from me… and thanks 🙂
Jan 23, 2012 @ 23:49:32
Anytime! I get caught in the same rut of “Why bother?” and this is what I do. I make a list of how awesome I am and why, and then I start to feel much better.
It just works MUCH better when someone else tells you you’re fantastic. So- you’re fantastic!
Jan 24, 2012 @ 11:45:16
thanks- for some reason i find i can never hear that too many times 😉
Jan 28, 2012 @ 17:13:06
Do you know how many of your blogger family think you are just awesome?? Hundreds! Thousands! Really! A long time ago I realized when someone, even someone we do not know and who does not really know us, chooses to say something unkind to us we tend to remember that forever. The kind things people say to us we tend to forget. I ran across a little spiral notebook in a stationary store that was bright yellow, had a bumblebee on the front and said BEE HAPPY! I bought that notebook and every time someone has said something kind, nice, uplifting, sweet, funny, loving, complementary to me I jot it down and then when someone chooses to claw my face off or something I just read my little notebook. It always helps! So—you start jotting those things down too and see what a treasure it is. As for migraines…sigh…..in my experience, the only thing that helps is a quiet, dark room and a lot of time. Hope you feel much better by now. hugs coming your way!
Jan 28, 2012 @ 22:26:44
aw, thanks carol- i love that this blog gives me access to super nice folks like you who will turn up to say just the right thing when i most need to hear it 🙂 thanks for bee-ing out there 😉