In my family, we have more than our fair share of Uncle Joes. My kids have an Uncle Joe, My Aunt G was married to Uncle Joe, and my grandfather had a brother Joe who died before we were born, making yet another Uncle Joe, who we grew up hearing stories about from time to time.
But some time around my teen years I heard rumblings of a mysterious figure in my family’s past. He seemed larger-than-life, and it was strange to me that I had never heard of him before. He was a much adored uncle, the baby of the family, doted on and well-loved by everyone. Whenever people spoke of him, they smiled and then teared up, yet nobody seemed to have any photos of him around. It took a while to piece together exactly how he fit into the puzzle of our family, and why it took me so long to hear about his existence.
They called him Yosji Batchi, which is Hungarian for Uncle Joe. Since my Grandma was raised by her grandparents, and her aunt was only about ten years older than she was, they were more like sisters and the lines between generations was a bit fuzzy. Yosji Batchi would come over and bring candy and take the nieces and grandchildren out to play and do all sorts of fun things that the grandparents were too old or too strict and stodgy to do. He was Uncle Fun at a time when it was more proper for girls to sit inside and embroider, and it seems like all of the kids pretty much worshipped him.
When Yosji got older he broke away from the Orthodox Judaism of his youth. He considered himself a modern and free-thinking Hungarian, and my great-grandparents superstitious and behind the times. He became somewhat estranged from the family and married a stunning Catholic woman, and together they had a bunch of blond-haired, blue-eyed children. From time to time, my Aunt or my Grandma would run into Yosji, and they said their heart always ached to have him back in their lives, but he was living happily as a Catholic, and he was really trying to put his old life behind him.
My Grandma’s people came to America and Yosji stayed behind in Hungary with his wife’s family, securely blended into his new life. His robust family continued to grow and prosper and all was well, and by all accounts they were model Hungarians. I think it is likely that many people didn’t even know he had a Jewish background.
It isn’t clear how Hitler’s troops found out Yosji’s secret, but we know that his renouncing of his Judaism didn’t save him. When his family was sent to the concentration camp, away went his lovely Hungarian wife, along with his innocent children, who were “contaminated” with his Jewish blood. In one fell swoop, his new life merged with his old, and his rosy-faced cherubs went into the same ovens with the Yiddish-speaking emaciated ghetto Jews, although his kids probably had no idea why they would have been separated from their Hungarian relatives. It’s likely that while the prevalent emotion around them was desperation, theirs was utter confusion, yet their entire family was wiped out in the Holocaust, along with many relatives they didn’t even know they had ties to.
I used to sit with my Aunt G (now deceased) and look through her photos of the relatives from Europe. It was a catalogue of destruction: He was a great Rabbi, but his whole family died in the Holocaust. She was my favorite cousin, but they didn’t make it out. She was married to your Uncle’s brother and they escaped to Israel, but then we lost touch…
When I look at my family now, I see hope and rebuilding. I see a future. I see the faces of those who came before me and didn’t make it, and I want this world to do better. I have seen what people can do when they band together in kindness and caring and I KNOW we can do better. It would be so easy in the face of evil to lose hope and just throw up my hands in the face of it all, but I have faith.
At the end of The Dairy of Anne Frank she writes that in spite of everything she still had faith- and then you find out that she never made it out of the Holocaust and I used to be crushed by that. Any time someone brought up that quote as a source of inspiration, I died inside. They would say, “Listen, if Anne Frank could still have faith in spite of the evil she was up against, how could we not have faith?” And I was always appalled! Look what a fat lot of good Anne Frank’s faith did for her! But now I feel differently. Now I feel like there is a reason to have faith. Because I feel like evil does NOT triumph over good. Evil can gain a foothold here and there, but ultimately the good people rally and good does prevail.
It is so hard to look at what is happening now and know what to do. Right now I don’t have an answer, but I believe that when the time comes, I will. I believe in myself that when the time comes, I will make the right choice, whatever that will be.
When I look around me these days, and it’s so hard to know who is a friend and who isn’t, I just offer up a silent prayer: that if or when the time comes, those around me will make the right choices too.
And that’s about all I have to say.
In loving memory of Yosji Batchi
Grant
Aug 15, 2014 @ 21:16:10
When natural or man-made disaster strikes what matters most?
As a devotee of “preparedness” I know about having cool gear, bug-out locations and a very important thing, which is very portable and doesn’t weigh anything to carry: knowledge. But the most important factor is “who’s around you?”. Your neighbors have a greater effect on your Fate than anything else. Your network. Your family. Your Friends. Those vastly outweigh how much “preparedness” you have in the forms of water, food, ammunition, etc.
I fear for America because I see the rising tide of Jew-blaming.
It CAN happen here.
So what good news can I offer? We HAVE learned from history. So very many Americans are clueless sheep but also so very many Americans simply will not allow it to happen. And there are more of us than you know.
Deb Seymour
Aug 15, 2014 @ 22:37:40
What Grant said…I am blessed to live on a Seattle block where everyone knows everyone and is supportive. I feel that my neighbors and I would be decent “first lines of defense”
What Grant said again: yes, a lot of Americans are ignorant and stupid and, alas, that is what the news media focuses on. How often do you read:
” 5 million people got up and went to work with no incidences today”
” two million moms hugged their kids today”
” Safeway and Costco sold food to 8 million people to day with no problems”
” Church/Synagogue/Mosque attendance happens with no issues”
” Ten million gardens sprouted something wonderful today”
etc etc
We only ever hear about the bad stuff. Which isn’t to DENY that bad stuff is out here… it is.
But again, as Grant said: “also so very many Americans simple will not allow it to happen. And there are more of us than you know 🙂 Even in Seattle…;-)
(Again: here is the link about the Church/Mosque/Synagoge being built in Berlin under one roof:
http://www.yesmagazine.org/happiness/berlin-to-build-a-mosque-synagogue-and-church-all-under-one-roof )
Deb Seymour
Aug 15, 2014 @ 22:39:34
P.S. And the Yosji Batchi makes me pissed off as hell. All Holocaust Stories like that make me cry. Like a small child, I have never understood and never will understand, why people pick on Jews. Or pick on ANYONE.
thegardenrenegade
Aug 16, 2014 @ 23:54:24
Grant- I love you love you love you- and have fantasies about you coming to rescue my family if it comes down to the wire… scary, yet calming… (and just so you know, I like any color toothbrush except orange 😉 )
thegardenrenegade
Aug 16, 2014 @ 23:59:18
Deb- I read the article. Very interesting. Yes, there is lots of good stuff that happens every day, and it’s that stuff that helps all of us to stay sane in the face of insanity, I think. Otherwise, we would all implode from the magnitude of horrors around us. I’m reading a pretty awesome book right now about the Japanese internments IN SEATTLE (who knew???) during WWII, which is fascinating- but at the same time is making my skin crawl… I will most likely post about it soon since it is so thought-provoking, so stay tuned…
djdfr
Aug 17, 2014 @ 02:30:05
If we lose hope, fall into despair, then evil wins. I refuse that. Good will conquer. 🙂 We must continue to practice it. I think more and more people are realizing the media does (do?) not create the world, does not give an accurate rendition.
Deb Seymour
Aug 17, 2014 @ 16:56:02
Yes- the Japanese Interments were frightening.
It is something that has always been in the historical shadows for my family as West Coasters: my parents, as children lived through watching their friends neighbors in their California home towns being taken away and no one had any good explanations to give them other than “National Security” “War Time” and “The Enemy”.
My mother as a ten year old child was terribly upset and scared but at the same time, had to put her trust in the adults around her because…well, she was only ten. When I look at my Dad’s junior high and highschool yearbooks from that time ( he was seven years older than my mom) it is frightening: one year there are many Japanese faces, the next year there are NONE.
Glad you took the time to read the Yes! article. It gave me a lot of hope that more people are willing to be allies than not.